Out of The Fire
Out of Fire
Out of the void came a great light and the light was all consuming.
She sensed the light in its brightness, and felt it also. She felt its burning brightness; she sensed its all pervading brilliance, everywhere bright and burning …….. A great light, filling her mind………. This…… was the very beginning.
She felt the sound also.
The sound came upon her with a great fury and it shook her very being …….. her senses were shattered by it, every particle in her was seared by it. The light came out of the darkness and there was confusion and fear in her. The cataclysm wrenched her mind in the void, and there was screaming.
There had been screaming, she sensed, ……for a very long time.
A long time passed.
The void that was …… was infinite. The void was her mind and there was no sense in it.
The essence of her, knew itself not……
And a long time passed.
She grew to know her isolation and was aware of the vast reaches of it but there was no thing tangible to give identity to her consciousness. She wept; for she was aware of her streams of thought but had no grasp of time, and this troubled her, greatly.
She sought reference points. ……. A pattern emerged.
There was light ….. and then there was dark. She rejoiced in the light, and recognised this as day, but the dark haunted her and she feared it. Then the light returned and she saw that it was good.
In her rejoicing she explored the light, feeling its gentle warmth and sustenance, and she began to make it a secure place where her thoughts could be located.
But in the darkness: in the darkness she floated into a great abyss where she was without form; and madness lurked there. She fought her hopelessness by straining all her senses into seeking structure and pattern in the abyss. ……… She sensed light there too. Points of light, so faint that she considered them to be aberrations at first, but gradually they took remote station in the firmament of her mind …….. and she called it …. ‘night’.
In the loneliness of the night she sensed, far off, a great aching chasm of desire; a magnet, like her own loneliness, and she was utterly moved by it, despite its formless nature. She took it into her deepest mind, and held it there.